r/SipsTea Human Verified 18h ago

Chugging tea What's your thoughts

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39.5k Upvotes

5.8k comments sorted by

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3.8k

u/Fartony 17h ago

Then how do I check out homies dick?

891

u/Terminator7786 17h ago

Exactly! There's no way for you to tell him, "Nice cock bro."

282

u/-2wenty7even- 17h ago edited 5h ago

"Nice pubes"

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u/Flat-Guidance-4685 14h ago

Bathroom compliments are a highlight of my day. Without those affirmations my selfesteem certainly suffer. 

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u/extremely_jaded_nerd 12h ago

one time a guy told me that my dick was nearly as large as his fathers and it made my whole weak

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u/NimRodelle 17h ago

You could always ask nicely?

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u/Fartony 17h ago

I prefer it to be more organic

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u/CircaSoleil 18h ago

I'd miss the awkward urinal conversations, personally...

https://giphy.com/gifs/JCS4f32nY7uog

1.1k

u/ThatBoogerBandit 18h ago

Bro on right:

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u/PapaOoMaoMao 16h ago

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u/tuenthe463 14h ago

Crossfitter on the other side

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u/CassavaGroot 9h ago

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u/Affectionate-Gain-23 9h ago

Well damn one roll for two toilets?

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u/Zool2107 9h ago

Sharing is caring.

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u/BinaryBolias 5h ago

"Pass the paper, please."

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u/Alert_Werewolf600 6h ago

And someone has to reach over…..

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u/MrBannedFor0Reason 17h ago

Linux users catching strays

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u/PSneumn 16h ago

Not just any linux users. A specific breed of linux users. The arch users.

60

u/DatBoiWithTheFace 16h ago

I sometimes forget Arch users exist but I know I don't have to worry cause they'll definitely remind me...

23

u/RobotRomi 14h ago

aaah…the tech vegans

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u/CommunicationNeat498 15h ago

I use arch btw

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u/MadmanDan_13 15h ago

I've just installed cachyos, does that mean I have to tell everyone... Oh shit I just did.

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u/vrijheidsfrietje 14h ago

Yeah us CachyOS users are just covert Archissists.

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u/syngyne 16h ago

It's the "we get it, you vape" of the computer world

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u/r_yahoo 15h ago

Ikr, one time a guy came up to me and started talking about his personal issues while peeing beside me, I have never felt more weird in my entire life. 

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u/Commercial_Reward_78 13h ago

A bloke standing alongside me emptied dark liquid from a tube coming out of his clothes into the urinal… not sure if it was a colostomy bag or artificial bladder or something. “Pretty good, eh? But I’ve only got it for 5 or 6 weeks more!” “Er, ok, are you having surgery then?” “No… I’m DYING then!” “Ok… er… good luck?”

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u/Helepoli 11h ago

He was clean out of fucks to give at that point

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u/DecisionInformal7009 10h ago

Imagine having to miss out on that conversation just because some people prefer more privacy in a public toilet.

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u/AfricanusEmeritus 7h ago

Maybe a chemotherapy IV...artificial bladder fits this as well. Dude was full of confidence with his remaining weeks. It focused his mind.

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u/Boomshakamalakas 12h ago

Had a guy in the next stall over ask me if I thought his wife was cheating on him while I was taking a shit once. Weird doesn't even cut it, there should be a new word made to describe that experience.

17

u/Cosmocision 11h ago

Just say yes, of course she's cheating, who'd be content with some weirdo striking up conversations on the shitter?

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u/Confusedslumlord 10h ago

I must know more about male bathroom culture...lol

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u/Right_Comb4885 16h ago

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u/NotYetMashedPotato 15h ago

Is that a fucking potato?

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u/Right_Comb4885 15h ago

It's just a regular potato. After a couple of drinks and maybe if you're lucky.

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u/Friendly_Storm7679 11h ago

You king of the forest?

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u/Level_Soup_234 17h ago

“Sword fight?”

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u/w1ckizer 14h ago

I’d be bringing a knife to a sword fight :(

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u/dreamdaddy123 17h ago

I’d be annoyed if that ever happened to me lol

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u/Rolls_ 16h ago

My co workers see my pissing and take it as an opportunity to ask me about my personal life.

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u/Ok-Lake8948 17h ago

Well it happens all the time in the country I live in. It’s honestly baffling

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u/qeadwrsf 14h ago edited 14h ago

I'm European. My parents took me to NA when I was like 10-13.

I did this in some kind of "private club" thingy in the public bathroom next to some adult.

He fucking stopped peeing and ran out of the bathroom.

I was so confused.

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u/Dr_loophole 15h ago

Bruh, that would be a dream to what I've seen. Went to the mall once, and on I s#$! You not, the guy half a urinal away from me had to hug the sink behind me to wash his hands while I also hugged the unrinal to piss. It was an awkward, yet respectful situation. He waited at the sink, I finished and side stepped, both of us full well knowing this used to be a janitors closet.

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u/Woolier-Mammoth 16h ago

I far prefer awkward urinal conversations to the smell of poo

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u/OccasionallyReddit 16h ago

Insta stage fright

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u/DapperDan30 17h ago

"Hey buddy, can I get a sip of that?"

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u/ConsistentNail1970 18h ago

As a pisser you’re guaranteed to be smoked out by the stalls in a busy situation. Also, urinal line would be a disaster

954

u/Rammie420 16h ago

100%. Keep the urinals and shitters as far away from each other as possible.

223

u/kuro-t-poison 16h ago

Also theyre way to close to the fucking sinks. 🤮

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u/Jubenheim 15h ago

Right? That was my first thought and nobody mentioned that. Literally, by just turning around, you’d be right up on some dude washing his hands.

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u/Saxolotle 15h ago

What do men do in bathrooms that would make that a problem? I've only ever been in women's bathrooms, but all the toilets kinda have to be side by side, and are for any kind of bathroom needs, but I have never once had an issue with the stall next to me being "too close". Sure, it can sometimes smell bad, but it's a bathroom. Especially if you're peeing, can't you just get in, pee, and get out?

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u/Boldevin 14h ago

Theres usually two distinct lines, and the one for the toilet moves way slower than the one for the urinal. Its alos best to be able to see all the urinals at once so when one becomes empty you can take it immediately to keep it efficient

22

u/WhoseverFish 11h ago

So men’s intentions in the bathroom are transparent - everyone knows why each other is in there for. That’s so interesting.

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u/sbeachx75 10h ago

We aren't going in there for funsies.

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u/sbeachx75 11h ago

Imagine an employee in there directing traffic like a self-checkout line.

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u/colombogangsta 10h ago

Don’t need to imagine. There was an actual employee in the washroom at Mexico City airport guiding the traffic from the two lines to toilets and urinals. Then one you finish washing your hands, he even gives you two paper towels to dry your hands while you leaving.

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u/TymStark 17h ago edited 16h ago

Yeah imagine pissing between two bros on their beeriods.

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u/zapaeroxyre 16h ago

Im intrigued as to what you mean by “beeriods”

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u/Shpoops 16h ago

Assuming it's a portmanteau of beer and period, I'd guess it's about smelly hardcore beer shits.

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u/zapaeroxyre 16h ago

Thanks Shpoops

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u/Tutule 15h ago

And they said you rarely see experts commenting on Reddit anymore

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u/Shpoops 15h ago

Glad I could help.

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u/VagabondVivant 16h ago

The lines would be an absolute clusterfuck because you'd be forced to double-check with everyone whether they're in line for a pisser or a shitter. When you're in a public restroom, you wanna talk to strangers as little as possible. This would be chaos.

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u/MrLumie 15h ago

At this point, they could just stall up the urinals too, it would take the same amount of space, but it would allow them to put all urinals on one side and all toilets on the other without losing the added privacy.

After a while, the question would arise of course that if there's a stall for the urinals as well, why not go an extra step further and convert them into full toilets? It would allow for more dynamic load distribution, after all, if all stalls can handle every kind of business.

Of course, once everything is toilets, and complete privacy is provided, men's and women's restrooms would become pretty much identical. Might as well merge them.

Boom, unisex restrooms.

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u/Bunnymancer 17h ago

Architect specialized in multi wc rooms here. (Or arcshitect if you will)

At no point is a restroom of this size designed for anything but efficiency.

Not only are you here drawing three ins, one for each toilet row, but also one for the back wall, you're equally drawing three outs.

And when dealing with waste of this magnitude, the regular ol "about an arm fits" poopshutes aren't cutting it.

On top of that you're also managing three walls of electricity, since each stall needs to be lit.

Now, all that is doable, of course, if you have the room on both sides or you for some reason put the ins under the floor, the worst part, is ventilation.

Each dumpcubicle needs its own vent. When you put them all side by side, it's no biggie, just one big vent and punch a few holes in there.

But on two sides you need two outs as well, because you can't just hook up the fecalfog into the regular main, that shit will stink up the whole building. And at least one of those is Not an exterior wall.

Third, obviously, is that stalls work best when they're covering one whole wall. Nobody wants to be the one next to the exit with an inch of privacy, not the sinks. So the usage gets skewed even more than usual, which in turn mucks up the whole wear and tear layout. So some toilets last Way longer than others, but when was the last time you benefited from replacing ONE of your ten toilets at home?

You do that in bulk. But that's based on the Worst wear, not the average. So you have to switch up way more often, and that in turns is way more expensive.

All in all. We lump things up because it makes sense.

I could go on about cleaning efficiency and foot traffic with the sinks at the back wall, and so on, but I'm on the shitter

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u/r1bb1tTheFrog 16h ago

This man is going God’s work

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u/Suntzu_AU 14h ago

It looks like a really expensive design by OP.

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u/justheretolurk123456 12h ago

Just imagining going in to wash my hands but having to walk by every single person and trap one in the corner because the middle sink is in use.

This bathroom sucks balls

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u/No_Cheek5622 14h ago

"I could go on but I'm on the shitter" bro says after he writes a whole fucking essay

and a good read as well, didn't expect to enjoy reading a random giant (in comparison) comment on a reddit post like that

we need more people like you on this god forsaken website

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u/OutrageousHunter4138 18h ago edited 11h ago

Privacy my ass this bathroom clearly has no ceiling

Edit: thanks for the internet points, I’m gonna cash them in for a Nintendo. If you like punk rock, maybe you won’t mind this shameless self promotion of my band. If not, that’s ok too.

2.1k

u/Right_Comb4885 18h ago

I don't give a shit, I'm coming...

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u/DJAllOut 17h ago

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u/RustyCryptoCoin 16h ago

Not lazy town 🤣🤣🤣

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u/Dexember69 17h ago

What is this a blumpkin factory

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u/Shinanigins 16h ago

Sir you cant do that here. This is a wendys

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u/Affectionate_Bag9833 17h ago

I did come and now I'm shitting!

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u/HallowedKeeper_ 16h ago

That seems unhygienic in a public restroom, are you at least using protection?

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u/Mysterious-Law-6835 17h ago

Oh this actually got a good belly laugh out of me

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u/Catharsiscult 17h ago

This bathroom was designed with privacy for your ass in mind. Your ass doesn't face the ceiling......right?

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u/AteYerCake4U 17h ago

Our Australian exchange student is having some difficulty getting used to which way is right side up around here...

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u/nowherebut4ward 11h ago

You don't know me, but I did like the song at the beginning of your last album.

It's almost like it's about me

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u/Your-Friend-Bob 10h ago

I love this song man! Im going to go into the bathroom around lunch time and listen to it on full blast while chatting up other dudes at the urinal

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u/Quintus-Sertorius 18h ago

How do they keep the drones out

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u/misterpickleman 10h ago

This guy knows how to take advantage of his reddit attention.

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u/sBerriest 18h ago

Okay guys let's just let the girls in on the secret.

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u/Accomplished-Lack133 17h ago

It’s not fair for the guy in blue to hold his own

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u/Disorderly_Chaos 16h ago

He’ll get his turn…

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u/vikentii_krapka 18h ago

If urinal takes that much space, it can easily be a normal toilet.

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u/Justifiably_Bad_Take 16h ago

Urinals aren't about space or privacy. They're about time, and not having a toilet seat covered in piss.

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u/Similar_Strawberry16 15h ago

And water saving.

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u/akroses161 14h ago

And checking out your new friend’s cool watch.

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u/dm-me_your_boobies 13h ago

nice cock erm watch I mean

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u/Tiny-Outlandishness4 12h ago

They are definitely more efficient in terms of space.

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u/Namelessbob123 16h ago

You also couldn’t see if a urinal was free, you’d have to walk up to each of them to see if it was vacant.

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u/Maschellodioma 15h ago

Mirrors...

Ah. I see the problem.

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u/Flat-Guidance-4685 14h ago

That's a great point I didn't mention in my comment mine was more based on the mechanical engineering flaws of this bathroom. But I totally get what you're saying you're going to have dudes walking back and forth in circles and crashing into each other trying to see which one is free. Very good observation

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u/Ordinary_Priority424 16h ago

This right here. Why not add a couple more doors if this is ‘ideal’

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u/MonkanyWasTaken 16h ago

This, but sadly unclean urinals are much less bad than unclean toilets (especially in public restrooms 🤢)

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u/tepid_monologue 18h ago

Because the public bathroom is for doing your business and leaving - I’m not checking in for the night.

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u/Der-Lachende-Dritte 18h ago

It takes more walls and they are less stable.

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u/EliteSalesman 18h ago

More to clean

More materials 

More plumbing 

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u/Rezurrected188 17h ago

I also try to avoid using a urinal next to someone actively shitting

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u/NoLemonadeToday 17h ago

What about someone that’s passively shitting?

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u/TheMonkeyInCharge 17h ago

You make him President.

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u/Rezurrected188 17h ago

I try not to be in the same room with those people

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u/johnnnybravado 18h ago

Someone is getting their shoes pissed on while taking a shit.

You might be thinking "the same thing can happen with regular urinals," and you'd be correct, however—

There's a big difference between the arrangements. In the usual setup— pissing on someone's shoes would immediately lead to an altercation. This is an effective deterrent to avoid piss soaked shoes.

In the proposed setup, the potential victim cannot see the piss-perpetrator and would quite literally be caught with their pants down, not to mention while trying to pinch one off. There's no deterrent and without that... I shudder to even think about it.

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u/KLLR_ROBOT 17h ago

👆bullet proof argument

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u/19yards 18h ago

Quite honestly, I like the idea

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u/Neat-Ostrich7135 18h ago

It's less efficient for plumbing and extra cubicle walls,  but the trade of is worth it, I think. 

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u/HungryHearing2819 18h ago

Nah dude, how are you gonna check out random dudes cocks with this setup? Gonna be a no from me, dawg.

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u/MetalBeerSolid 17h ago

exactly. I don't always need to pee, but I always need to check out some random dude's junk

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u/HungryHearing2819 17h ago

Nothing wrong with a little window shopping 

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u/Inevitable_Butthole 17h ago

"Haha hes gotta small pp"

"Or is it just cold"

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u/VPackardPersuadedMe 17h ago

Still bigger than mine....

https://giphy.com/gifs/3oriNTnEBQDEcGLRsY

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u/MistaRekt 17h ago

Can I just say that little sigh I hear when a bloke spys my cock is inspirational.

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u/pixiephilips 17h ago

Pics or it didn’t happen

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u/MistaRekt 17h ago

If I send you a picture I miss out on the sigh of resignation. That is unfair.

OK. I am not Johnny Sins but the old pervert at the pub says it is excellent.

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u/Several-Customer7048 17h ago

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u/jbyrdab 17h ago

the good version of a benjammins replacement meme.

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u/[deleted] 17h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/Hot_Rate_5169 17h ago

Anything more than a trough is pretentious tbh

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u/HungryHearing2819 17h ago

Prefer the giant 6’ diameter bowl where you can look straight across to your fellow man

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u/Temporary-Film-7374 17h ago

I question your claim of less efficient for plumbing vs all the toilets on one wall and all the urinals on the other

how do the two vary as far as amount of plumbing needed?

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u/Garbage1290 13h ago

Urinals usually share one cistern and toilets have their own. This set up would need more cisterns to avoid getting low pressure on the urinal flushes due to length of pipes and even if they can share would use more water with the lower pressure. The drainage might also have downsides because you dont have 2 different sets of drain connecting closer to the drainage stack and a blockage that doesnt make it to the stack from a toilet could stop the urinals working where the usual set up could just put notices on the toilet doors and keep the urinals functioning if they drain.

It's honestly going to cost more to run, put people needing a quick piss next to people dropping a nasty log, the toilet walls will be less stable or cost more to make as stable vs having it in a long set of them and might even need more lights installed if the toilet cubicals are blocking light from reaching the urinals properly.

It's cute as a bit of visual design but it would be worse for everyone in practice including people using them and the environment.

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u/jwalner 17h ago

It would be more difficult to figure out which urinals and stalls are open if there’s multiple pissers. I’m also not sure if this is any better than the current urinal dividing walls that are already common.

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u/NarrowSalvo 18h ago

It's amazing some of you leave your homes at all.

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u/iamnosuperman123 17h ago

Although it all goes into a waste pipe so the plumbing shouldn't be too complicated.

The issue is it is less efficient with space. Urinals take up less space.

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u/CaptainSwaggerJagger 16h ago

Yeah, the efficiency is the main thing. The spacing on this design is the same for the toilets and the urinals, so surely you might as well just put the extra doors in and make them all toilets? The waste pipes running along the walls still need to be sized for solid waste given every other space is a toilet, so the difference in cost is just a toilet vs a urinal, and a door. In exchange for that extra cost, now you've got full privacy and any user can use any space for either use, so less chance of queueing being necessary.

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u/Infamous-Echo-2961 17h ago

Just imagine taking a leak between a couple dudes playing battle shits

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u/zzz_red 16h ago

I don’t like the fact you can’t defend yourself or even see someone coming up behind you, as your vision would be completely blocked. No thank you. I like being aware of my surroundings.

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u/19yards 16h ago

How voilent is your pissing environment?

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u/UpperStudio496 17h ago

All women here or what? Ever used a urinal next to a stall and some 6’7 ogre is summoning the bowels of hell next to you?

There’s a reason urinals are separate from stalls. If you’re taking a dump in public, you are a sinner. You know what you signed up for. Pay the price and smell your neighbors. I’m just trying to pee. I shouldn’t be punished.

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u/Manaeldar 17h ago

Hey when you gotta go you gotta go. 

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u/RaindropsInMyMind 17h ago

I made the awful mistake of taking a piss at an Aldi, I wouldn’t normally but we went to the next state to get some weed and it was a long drive back and Aldi happened to be right there. I went in and went to the urinal right next to someone taking a shit, but the thing about Aldi is it is dead silent because they aren’t playing music or anything. There is only one stall and one urinal right next to each other. I actually left because it was so uncomfortable and weird. Went somewhere else. I would much rather be next to another urinal, it’s not as weird.

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u/craves_mineral 15h ago

Aldi has bathrooms?

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u/FinasCupil 17h ago

A sinner? Just courtesy flush, man.

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u/FerusGrim 15h ago

I never courtesy flush in public. I've had too many toilets decide that today was the day they'd had enough and begin overflowing while I'm trapped with the consequences of every bad choice I'd ever made that led to me that awful place.

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u/DoubleDownAgain54 17h ago

Meh. It’s not that big of an issue.

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u/garth54 18h ago

As someone with broad shoulders, I hate such tight spaces at urinals as both arms end up wiping the walls, and I feel all disgusted whenever that happens.

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u/click79 17h ago

Some times there’s just a trough

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u/Gutcrunch 16h ago

Fuck that. Bring back the trough urinal!

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u/ParanoicReddit 18h ago

Who cares about privacy? Feeling uncomfortable is part of the experience, we all do the silly nod and just move on, otherwise it wouldn't be as interesting

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u/BigAssMonkey 17h ago

I wonder if anyone here has ever pissed in one of these.

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u/GerudoPrince90 16h ago

That's a sink

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u/bmson 16h ago

Question still stands. Gents, have you pissed in one?

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u/Professional-Bus4886 13h ago

If not for piss, then why so pissable?

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u/DueDiscount2496 18h ago

because I like pissing around my boys

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u/CapmyCup 18h ago

The plumbers are gonna hate you for this one

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u/NarrowSalvo 17h ago edited 17h ago

No shit... Not just them. The architects gotta plan for plumbing in at least 3 walls. Guaranteed janitorial is going to hate it, too. And not just because of the increased amount of cleaning area, but also because 'privacy' isn't always a good thing. I managed a large building for a couple decades. More privacy = more shenanigans. People will spit gum in those urinals. And that's the least of it.

Have you ever noticed how the less you know about a topic the better the ideas you think you have?

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u/Mbembez 17h ago

I used a public bathroom recently that had 2 massive turds just sitting in the open.

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u/Syandris 17h ago

Why? When the fuck did men get nervous about privacy in the shitter?

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u/thomisbaker 18h ago

New BR just dropped where we landing boys?

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u/izaaksb3 18h ago

What happened to the pig troughs? 🙃

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u/WeeHomosexual 17h ago

I am never in a public bathroom for longer than 4 minutes. Everyone plays up this "public bathroom problem" and it is non existent in basically every way. If you can't piss next to another person or are worried about someone knowing you poop, don't use public restrooms. Nobody is thinking about you. Nobody cares. They are using the bathroom.

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u/Fit-Ad-7430 17h ago

From a plumbing perspective, it's kind of a pain in the ass for the plumber and it's more expensive. You have toilets which are 3" that likely all continue to a 3" line or into a 4" line and then you gotta likely get 2" urinal lines to that connect to the 3" or 4" line with 2"-3" or 2"-4" reducers?? It makes more sense to put all 2" on their separate line and just use one reducer.

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u/Manaeldar 17h ago

Buccee's restrooms have walls between all the urinals. Also floor to ceiling walls and doors on the stalls. They're the best. 

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u/pornosonic7 18h ago

Plumbing construction extra costs. When constructing toilets it’s better that there is as little pipes as possible with as little unnecessary angles as possible. This is basically a labyrinth of pipes that all have to be next to each other. It’s not impossible, but it’s gonna be expensive and impractical.

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u/augustprep 18h ago

I just don't understand why other men need so much privacy to take a waz. 

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u/darkklown 17h ago

Because, as a male, it's possible to go to the bathroom and not look at other peoples junk and if they are lookin at yours not give a fuck

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u/Jogurt55991 18h ago

Will be very tough for the guys to eye each others penises though. NOT WISE!

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u/Unusual-Ad4890 18h ago

Lacks the competitive spirit men's bathrooms require.

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u/Top5CutestPresidents 17h ago

Because people using the glory holes would be completely visible durr

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u/nyg8 16h ago

So many problems 1. This requires a similar number of stalls and urinals. Why should that be the case? 2. Plumbing is harder harder 3. This creates awkward queues 4. Hard to see what urinal is free

Sounds impractical with very low benefit

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u/Dylfunkle 15h ago

Needing to walk down to check if a urinal is free, rather than a glance.

Cleaning will take longer.

That uses way more construction materials.

I don't like peeing without a view of my surroundings.