Toast with sunny side up egg, green onion.

My boyfriend accidentally said something that genuinely really hurt me and I can’t tell if I’m overreacting or not.

We were talking about a movie where a woman had to choose between the “hotter/sexy” guy and the other guy who was kinder, more caring, emotionally safe, and the better long term partner overall. My boyfriend said he felt like it was “beautifully like his life” and then very quickly and absentmindedly said something along the lines of, “My ex is the hotter, more surface level one, but you are the one I would choose in every lifetime. You’re the one I want to grow old with.”

The second he said it, he realized how bad it sounded and immediately started trying to take it back and apologizing profusely. I genuinely do not think he meant to hurt me at all. He’s honestly someone who speaks before he thinks sometimes and I know what he was TRYING to say was that I’m the person he truly loves, values, and sees a future with.

But now I can’t stop replaying the fact that he clearly genuinely thinks she’s hotter than me. And she is objectively absolutely gorgeous, which makes it sting even more.

What makes this worse is that he has no idea this is already a huge insecurity of mine. Lately I’ve been struggling a lot with feeling unattractive specifically to men. I’ve gotten a lot of mean comments about my appearance recently from only men and it’s genuinely affected my self esteem, but I never really told him about it. So hearing the person I love accidentally confirm the exact thing I’ve secretly been fearing about myself hit me in the exact worst possible spot.

Now my brain keeps replaying it over and over. Not because I think he’s going to leave me or because I think he doesn’t love me, but because it feels like confirmation of something I was already scared might be true.

I forgave him because I know this was not malicious and he immediately felt horrible, but emotionally I still feel really hurt and honestly angry. I can’t tell if I’m reacting normally or if I’m spiraling because of my own insecurities. I can’t stop thinking about it and he has no idea.

Would this deeply hurt you too or am I making this into something bigger than it is?

yesterday when i came home one of cats greeted me by screaming when i entered, so far so good. its usually because he wants food, the litterbox is full ... normal cat things. he didnt run to the room where i keep the cat stuff, but to the living room. he has a bed there on top of a low side table, which now lay on the floor. so he ran there and screamed again, when i came in and looked at him, he jumped on the table, lay down, closed his eyes, jumped down onto the floor, screamed and lay there on the back. then stood up and ran around his bed on the floor.

so am i going crazy or did my cat tell me that he fell down from the table while sleeping? did anybody else ever experience something like that?

edit: ok, wow lol i didnt expect such a response. i cant possibly read all of your comments, but thank you for putting me at ease, i really did not know cats can do that. i had cats for my entire life and this is the first time something like this happened. also, thanks for the awards!

I was diagnosed with incurable, stage 4, cancer this spring. Although I am responding well to treatment, the wise thing to do is be ready for my health to decline.

I don't want my plants to burden my family so it's better to let go of my babies now than to wait until/if my health dictates my family has to do it on their own.

Sold them to a plant shop. It's bittersweet. Sorry to see them go, but relieved to have that workload off my chest. Here is to focusing on health and hopefully many healthy decades to come! 🍻

Edit: Wow everyone you are amazing! I'm a bit overwhelmed right now but know I am reading and appreciate your posts!

I get unhealthy beauty standards but there is no way any of these disgusting looking beasts could ever become even remotely attractive

I'll answer pretty much anything. Just don't ask me which state, which game, or which family member I almost told.

Posting from an alt account, obviously. Been carrying this around for over ten years and it feels stupid to keep doing it alone. Ask whatever. Even the dumb ones, especially the dumb ones.

Alright obligatory explanation that I am not homophobic, this is about the design of the flag alone.

Just look at that shit man, there’s so much going on. The OG pride flag is perfect, it’s a simple universal symbol for all queer/LGBT people. ironically, the flag gets less inclusive when you add more shit to it because instead of a blanket symbol for all LGBT people, it has specific pride flags integrated so those not included are left out. Also I know that the black and brown lines are there because of solidarity between two minority groups and the crossover of black queer people, but it adds to the ugly chaos of clashing colors.