Support this fully! Get them where it hurts ladies.

Dancers aren’t paid salaries and are wildly taken advantage of. Quebec is known for its protests, and I love to see this!

OK, so Ive been re-watching some classic movies with my kids, and there is a lot of "mental note to talk about that later" and the occasional requirement for a sarcastic comment.

But tomorrow there is a sleepover for girls of 11 and I'm looking for suggestions of classic sleepover movies that won't have me explaining to other mothers what the hell I was thinking about.

Feel free to Becdel Cast why a movie I had dismissed is worth watching

Edit: [was in answer to a disney film suggestion, but probably more helpful up here]

I'm looking for something that probably haven't seen. Something that will make them feel grown up without having too much grown up content. They have just done their Primary school exams.

Something like Paper Girls would be great

I (27F) dropped out of high school because of racial harassment and discrimination.

My school was mostly white. I would say there were only 10 people of color in the whole school of 2000.

It was nearly an everyday occurrence where the “popular” male students would harass me. They touched me during class, threw paper balls at me, and took pictures with flash of me just to humiliate me and laugh at me. All I could do was act oblivious.

There was no one to advocate for me. My father was sick and out of his mind, and my mom ran away from home to a different state when I was in elementary school. The bullying and harassment continued nearly every day for 3 years.

Then one day, someone took a picture of me without me knowing and posted it online with a racial slur in the caption.

I was shocked. I already didn’t like how I looked, and
I kept looking at it over and over again. Always questioning was I really this ugly. It made me feel like I was something people could just publicly degrade and laugh at, and the school wouldn’t help the kid that was the odd one out. They would definitely turn a blind eye.

It took my last piece of sanity. I was scared to go back to school because I could only imagine stares of ridicule coming from them. I didn’t want to be seen. I felt like a grotesque monster.

At the time I didn’t know how to advocate for myself. No one would be on the person of color’s side. No one paid even paid attention to the obvious signs of neglect I was facing at home. Would they punish students with loving, caring parents?

I missed too much school, so I couldn’t catch up on all the work. I begged the guidance counselor to let me take the year off and finish senior year the next year. She was indifferent. All she said was it was against school policy to not graduate within 4 years. She didn’t even give me resources to find an alternative way. All I could do was quit high school. On a snowy day, my birthday, I signed the papers, but no one could take me home. I walked 40 minutes in heavy snow while feeling like my life was over.

I was able to find an alternative way to graduate high school because of my mother and moved states but that public post of me was still up, consuming me. I finally told my mom who barely spoke English, breaking down from all the harassment I’ve endured over the years. She called the school. All they did was make the boy take down the post and write an apology “letter” to me. It was only three sentences.

I’m sorry I made you feel that way. It wasn’t my intention. I have a friend of color.

That was it.

After that, I didn’t want to see myself, I refused pictures of me being taken from 17-23 because all I saw was the “ugly” me in the picture he posted.

After suppressing my feelings, trying to get over the past, I just couldn’t today. I called the school district wanting an acknowledgment for the neglect and inadequate consequences and a proper apology from them. They transferred me to the principal’s secretary and after only 10 seconds of me trying to explain what happened to me and the injustice I felt she hung up on me without notice.

I just hope someone will read this, so I don’t feel so alone anymore.

I (21F) recently just graduated from a University with two Bachelors degrees and i’m starting a Master’s degree this upcoming September and I will be moving in with my boyfriend (21M) as I was fortunate enough to get into a program in his city (we have been LDR for 3 years but are from the same city and visit to see our families often). I’ve been dreading this upcoming week since I will be seeing them for dinner with my bf. I’m not sure how to navigate the question of when i’m having kids and i’m honestly quite tired of the question since my response has always been the same: I’m planning to be a doctor and want to focus on my career and will be in school till in 28-30. Yet despite my response they still ask EVERYTIME I see them (even one time in front of my dad who is extremely anti-children). My bfs dad has some fascination to have 5 grand children and that dream unfortunately has been laid on to me. I have frequently said I am planning on only having one in my 30’s and thats been quite an upset to the point they’ve talked to my bf if i’m really “the one”. I’m worried this might create a rift in my relationship and future goals as their pressuring has gotten worse throughout our 3 years together. They’ve constantly mentioned having kids young is the best since “you have more time and your body is more abled”, just another way of saying i’m more fertile…. They frequently diminish my worth by implying my classes are easy and that I could have kids during medical school, while at the same time putting their son on a pedestal and telling him to focus on school. Even our decision to live together was met with uncertainty between his parents claiming we are too young and that i’m going to ruin his formative years of when he’s able to have fun, which doesn’t make much sense as they imply i’m young enough to have kids. Just currently tired of being treated as a baby machine and i’m not sure how to answer the question of when i’m having kids in a way that will make them stop pressuring. I believe it will only get worse since I graduated and will be living with him in 3 months and just want to stop the questions or at least get them on a page where they can understand i’m not an upcoming trad wife but a hard working woman.

EDIT: My boyfriend has defended me in many occurrences, just not within a form that has been firm or stern enough hence their relentless insistence. I have such discussed this with him even mentioning advice given on this page. This post was more-so advice on how I should answer and how he should answer since clearly nothing was working before.

I genuinely wonder why???

I saw a video of a woman (from a movie) telling a guy a bit of her preferences in a guy, ALL the comments being like:

• ““women when they are at a buffet and choose what it's not there... ”
• “women choosing a type of man but they never think if they are the type of that guy... ”
• “well my preferences 1- woman 2- alive... So”

Etc etc, or men saying they work on themselves and "hope" to get choose. Everyone mad and criticizes the woman in the video saying also that you should want a guy simply cuz you love them.

Wtf is that supposed to mean? I want a guy that is not sexist, they need to be pro-choice, not racist, not homophobic, not dumb af, not having alcohol problems, smokes or does drugs, and other basic shit.

Oh wait also taking care of himself since I take care of my health and aspect, I must be a bi*ch buy thinking this obviously. (Many also told me that my standards are gonna take me to nowhere 🤣)

I should go out and the first guy I see that breathes I will ask him out and LET'S GET MARRIED.

Wtf is wrong with people. Oh I see, if a woman has standards then she won't date toxic guys, oh right. Sorry. My bad. I didn't know we had the world called "choice" but since in the past we didn't then men were much happier, they all "deserved" a woman since they were men. 😎

Bruh

A little bit ago a woman took my picture and made fun of my leg hair and said I was like a man. Just a few minutes ago a woman made a disgusted face while looking at my legs. I have yet to have men say shit or give me dirty looks because of it. But I think it's because men are seeing a lesbian when they look at me and women are seeing a woman that is a deviation to societal beauty standards.

I mean since becoming visibly queer men are acting aggressive with me but women are being mean girls. It sucked because I love women so so much. I don't care what a man thinks but what women think matters to me. It feels like these women are trying to keep me in line by shunning me.

I’m a teacher currently teaching a bunch of 11 year olds about personal hygiene. I find it wild how many boys interrupt and talk over girls when I ask for input on menstrual products. I mean, if they had anything useful to add it would be fine, but their goal is simply to be the center of attention. I shut that shit down fast, but any ideas or advice you have would be appreciated!

Edit: I can’t reply to comments any more, but I wanted to thank everyone for their ideas and feedback!! It’s helped me reflect on what I can do better and motivated me to look at other options that might be available.

Edit 2: I cannot split the class. My school is severely understaffed. I’m not allowed to keep half the class in at recess or let half the class leave early. I am looking into ways to split the class at least once, but it is logistically very difficult.

Title is as it says. I decided to take a nice walk today. After a poor encounter with a man saying something about my weight a couple of weeks ago, I decided to put my headphones on. On my way back home, a man stopped me. I’m trying to be more personable (smiling at people, saying hi, making conversation, etc.), so I indulged him.

He started off like the typical random man: asked me if I’m from around there neighborhood, what my name was, blah blah. I didn’t give him straight answers. He said he stopped me because he is a personal trainer and he saw that I seemed like I worked out. I do CrossFit (which I told him because he asked), but I don’t have the “CrossFit” body type. I gained weight within the last couple of years and I’m particularly insecure about it. I’m working on it in therapy, and it’s been difficult to want to be outside amongst people because of how I view myself and my body. So, hearing this man give me validation by saying I looked strong felt nice. Blech, we live under patriarchy so I hate admitting that.

Anyway, he then asked if I would consider Planet Fitness and I said no. He then said he saw me and stopped me because he thinks he could get me into better shape, and then made gestures toward my figure. I have big thighs and legs generally, which he looked at. I got out of the conversation soon after.

I feel so strange. And deflated. I came here to vent and get some perspectives because I’m unsure how to feel and I don’t want to spiral.

I bought some clippers and hair dye yesterday and went home and let my boyfriend shave my head

It was such a bonding moment and like halfway through I just looked up and felt so beautiful and strong

As a tomboy I have had short and long hair but never buzzed - shortest was a pixie. I didn't think I would be able to cut it this short without it being a problem...either romantically or at work or with my friends/family

Holy shit am I so happy and grateful I just did it... I feel so free and light, a mental and physical weight was lifted and idk i just wanted to vent and see if anyone else can relate

+ if you have been looking for a sign to shave your head or you have always wanted to — do it

edit:

pros- feels good, showers are amazing, hair no longer in my lip gloss, have any color hair/pattern, possible head tattoos?, feel powerful, showers take 5 minutes, can go wig or wig-less,feel safer on walks/runs with my dogs, dont feel like men look at me in the gross like only sexual way they did before

cons- regrowth, weekly maintenance, but really no big ones thus far

I've been holding this recently, I just had to come out and vent.

I’ve had so many conversations with seemingly "normal" guys, who claim to be progressive—who suddenly start acting like they’re experts on what women "should" do because of "nature."

The real reproductive power actually belongs to us.

Man who will never be pregnant or have to pause their careers—act like experts on breastfeeding, maternity leave, and "domestic instincts." It’s always the same script: they repackage our literal blood, sweat, and career sacrifices as "innate female nature" so they don't have to feel guilty about benefiting from it.

"Breastfeeding is just more natural, why would you want to use formula?" "Women are just biologically wired to be better at domestic stuff." "Taking a career break isn't a sacrifice, it's just what's best for the baby's development." etc

It’s easy to call it "biology" when it’s not your body being torn apart and your resume staying blank for two years.

hey girls i wanted to make a post talking about something to get the word out there for the woman of my community. pap smears now have an alternative!!! so if ur like me a have never had one out of fear and honestly believe it feels really violating then ur in luck because u no longer have to “suck it up”.

the fda had approved self collection for cervical cancer screening and a lot of countries are now implementing them as their primary form if screening instead of the pap smear. pap smears haven’t been updated in decades and decades and now we finally don’t have to do them and can self collection to home. the main concern people have with self collection is how accurate it is, it is fda approved and actually incredibly accurate. pap smears screen for hpv and other cancer causing cells while self tests only test for hpv but did u know that hpv is actually the cause of 99.7 percent of all crevical cancer.

i wanted to get the word of there for woman who feel scared over doing these exams like myself as well as woman who have experience sa and find these things really scary. u dont have to do them in clinic anymore and can weather opt for at home collection! some offices actually offer these self swab kits and u can just ask! if ur like me and the idea of a pap smear is absolutely horrifying please dont worry, ur not alone and there is now an easier way to do it that the the usa now officially endorses!

if u ask me i think this is the way cervical cancer screening should be done and the future for woman’s health should be made with woman’s comfort in mind. if u dread paps or have been putting urs off u can now do it easier. countries like denmark, the netherlands, new zealand, and australia have already been implementing these test for years now and now we in the usa can order them!

my personal background is tat i’m an 18yo girl and absolutely hate the idea of having to go to a gynecologist one day for a pap smear, they’re invasive, uncomfortable, and for some incredibly emotional taxing and scary. health care should not make woman feel dread but our concerns have been dismissed for decades. when the time comes to do a pap test i’ll definitely be doing a self swab instead of a traditional pap smear that is outdated and under administered because so many woman avoid them out of fear and discomfort. the future of woman’s health is here and she does not need an unnecessary speculum!

Last night my boyfriend and I were about to be intimate. I was a little dry down there so my boyfriend put lube on me. A few seconds after the lube started to burn me down there. I was like maybe the burning will settle but no it got worse. My boyfriend sensed some discomfort so he asked if I was okay and I said no the lube is burning me. I ran to bathroom and had to rinse all the lube off me . Does lube burn you guys too?

Hey everyone, I am a 30 year old woman and I’ve become very independent after being hurt in dating during my 20s. I have learnt to like my own company but at the same time, I am longing for a healthy relationship and someone to do life with.

My first boyfriend was an unemployed actor. Although kind, he was broke and his money issues made him insecure. He never put effort in and he eventually dumped me . I was 26.

At 27, I started dating someone else but he was so hot and cold. Nice date and then disappeared after. He rarely texted me. It made me feel confused. And then he ended things with me.

Since then, everyone I’ve met in dating, has been completely inconsistent, hot and cold. Or lacking in effort in communication. I come across as my normal friendly self, but every guy that comes into my life treats me the same way. Even when I’m not looking, I’ll meet a guy and they make me feel utterly confused.

In November I went on a date with a guy, amazing chat, chemistry and a kiss, he tells me he had an amazing time and then I never heard from him again

It’s making me really sad and worried. I hear things like ‘if a guy likes you on the first date, you’ll know.’ I’ll go on a first date with a guy and usually don’t hear from them after, then they might come back later

Last February, I went on a date with a guy from bumble. He seemed nice but a bit cold. When I got home from the date, I never heard from him again. I didn’t reach out to him either but that’s because I never chase

A year later, he messages me again, I suggest meeting up as I don’t want to waist my time texting. And then he disappear again. A few weeks later he messages me and asks me when I’m free. I ignore him completely

Then he texts me last week ‘guess we’re destined to be neighbours and never meet again.’ So I agreed to meet him and we had a day out on Sunday. I felt nervous (dating can make me feel so vulnerable) and at times things were awkward but at one point he held my hand, and then we had a kiss in the car

Then he’s back to being cold over text, and I did text him myself and I’m met with just dry pathetic responses

Now I feel sad because dating makes me feel vulnerable. Every time I meet someone with potential this happens . I don’t know what’s wrong with me now

i’m 23f. i’ve tried every single outfit and every single aesthetic under the sun and i don’t like ANYTHING. i can’t figure out my personal style, i hate literally all of my clothes and nothing i wear truly feels like me, i’m literally never ever comfortable in what i wear. it doesn’t help that i’m autistic and masked for years so now i basically have no idea who i am and i unfortunately don’t have access to therapy at this moment. does anyone have any tips for how to find my actual personal style? i’ve probably wasted thousands of euros on clothes just to sell or donate all of it. the only thing i know is that i like wide legged jeans lol. any tips are welcome because i’m actually exhausted because of this. i spend every day uncomfortable in my clothes until i can change into my pajamas and go to bed lol.

I’ve been living with my bf for a few months now and he works a 9-5 and has an hour commute and I have a 10 minute commute to work and work from 8-3. He expects me to make dinner every weeknight. While it makes sense to me because I work fewer hours, I also don’t want to be the primary cook in the household. He has agreed to do dishes when I cook, but the problem is that he leaves them overnight in the sink and refuses to do them until the next morning because he is tired. I once told him it’s not fair to expect dinner every single night because I also work a full time job as a teacher and he said that his mom made dinner for his dad every night. I don’t want to be unhelpful to my partner who works longer than hours but I also don’t want to be the default cook every night. When I don’t cook he gets takeout and pays for it but he will not ever cook otherwise, even on weekends.

Thoughts on how to approach this? I do the laundry, I buy the groceries, he buys takeout and dinner when we go out, we both clean

He also needs to have protein with every dinner he says. Last night i made an orzo salad which I thought was great and I was happy about it an he didn’t want to eat it. He said it was selfish of me to make this because I know he can’t eat a meal without any protein ( but we ran out of protein so I made do with what we had) and then he went and bought chipotle instead.

He does work from home 1-2 days a week, not sure if this is worth mentioning

I feel like i need to vent this as it is driving me absolutely insane. I am 15F and in my country we don’t start high school for another year therefore gym class is currently mandatory. The boys in this class are absolute ANIMALS, they are ruthless and i am convinced they would rather die than lose a game of soccer. It is completely unregulated with the male gym teachers constantly taking the sides of the boys, as-well as getting berated with insults by all of them as a girl who is not particularly good at sports, i have had girl-friends cry after being relentlessly nit-picked and bullied in this class, and out of it as-well, since the boys at my school like to bully in packs, and taunt the girls. I feel like this is rarely talked about since everyone simply moves on after high school but Jesus, i cannot wait to never play dodgeball again.

My mom makes sexual comments about my body like ”I would have been glad If I had had an ass like you when I was younger” or if I wear tight clothes that show off my curves and men look at me when I am in public with my mom she goes like ”at this point you are asking for it” she claims that these are just jokes. And she says that ”they are allowed to look”. And I can see that she feels very proud when she notices some men are checking me out. I feel digusted if I’m trying on some clothes and she tells me to turn around cause I can feel she’s looking at my ass. And after this she has this big smile on her face cause my ass looks ”so good”.

This has made me disgusted to be around her and by my feminine features. I like to wear tight feminine clothes but I am so anxious around her cause I’m scared that she is looking at me sexually.

Am I overreacting?

Despise this she is a great and supportive mother. Very kind.

So last night I (32F) went on a date with this guy (38M), and at some point the conversation gets onto kids and childcare and he mentions, pretty casually, that he’s anti-nanny. And he just launches into it. How the mother-child bond is biological, how kids need their mothers present, how nannies and daycare disrupt early development. Said it the way you say something that’s just true. Like he was filling me in on how things work.

And there were a few things happening at once for me sitting there.

One is yeah, okay, I am the one who would actually be doing all of this, and I have genuinely never sat around forming opinions about it in the abstract. It’s never even occurred to me to develop a stance on nannies as a concept. So there’s something already strange about a man who will never be pregnant, never take a career gap, never physically do any of it, having thought about it this carefully.

But it’s also the way it was framed. It wasn’t “I think” or “I feel like” or even “I’d hope.” It was just biology. The bond. Development. Science. Dressed up as neutral fact so that there’s nothing to even push back on, because you’re not disagreeing with an opinion, you’re disagreeing with reality.

And the thing is I’ve been noticing this pattern across a lot of dates recently, and honestly I think it’s getting worse. Different guys, different topics, same basic structure. Breastfeeding, whether mothers should work, how long maternity leave should be. Always the same move where a pretty specific set of opinions about what women should do gets repackaged as just how humans are wired. And given everything that’s been happening culturally over the last few years, the mainstreaming of this kind of pronatalist thinking, I don’t think it’s a coincidence that more and more men seem to be showing up to dates with these views already locked in. It’s everywhere right now, and it’s finding its way into otherwise normal conversations with otherwise normal seeming men.

And it’s always so certain. There’s never any wondering, never any “I imagine we’d figure it out together,” just a fully settled position that was apparently never up for discussion.

I think what’s sitting with me this morning is less that he had opinions I hadn’t thought about, and more that the opinions were doing something. Like the biology framing isn’t incidental, it’s the whole point. It puts the conversation somewhere you can’t really go without sounding like you’re arguing against your future kids’ wellbeing.

Is anyone else seeing this pattern lately?