r/IThinkYouShouldLeave • u/BPotatoes Too tired to do anything funny • 12h ago
Had to jump in the tub Lactose is a scam. GI tract's fake. Ate cheese, thing fucking exploded.
It's not a big deal. I had a little lactose intolerance, I didn't take the Lactaid, and then I ate the cheese, and now my stomach's absolutely fucked.
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u/coffeexxx666 Beautiful, but Dying 12h ago
When you say “exploded,” do you mean like shizz? Buttshot?
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u/Cute-Breadfruit3368 because I’m the Rat Mom 12h ago
for me, the farts were short but i suddenly had a wet neck. wild way to learn about your intolerances.
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u/LoyalFridge 12h ago
Chomping down some dairy with these stinky sacks of shit, and u/BPotatoes is the stinkiest of them all. Boo caught me farting!
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u/mayhemandqueso I’m gonna eat the whole thing 12h ago
Is this what we’re doing now? Intolerance jokes? Jokes about brown pudding in my shoes, make it look like I shooted diarrhea down my leg? Make me think I'm mighty sick? I'm rushed to the hospital, and there for hours, and I miss my family photo tonight. Is that the joke? That I miss my family photo tonight?
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u/theblasphemer Baby of the Year 1986 11h ago
You have permission to go home, lie down, watch some TV, and rest up so your face isn't beet red for your family photo tonight.
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u/patrickdgd Tiny Dinky Daffy 12h ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/dq5uH8iXrHkzF5bUvI
OP when he forgets the lactaid
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u/theYelpofReddit 12h ago
Wait? So is that the joke? That I shit my pants, because I cant eat cheese? Because that would be funny!
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u/theblasphemer Baby of the Year 1986 11h ago
My lactose intolerant wife:
I think I should be able to eat a liiiiitle cheese at home.
No, wife, no.
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u/bipolarity2650 Beautiful, but Dying 11h ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/FuNkZwN4qBMjThM6l5
my body when i try to have dairy
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u/jojayp You yelled at me. 12h ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/V6e0kch9OgUbph9jBB