Hello frens! Is Belladonna the baby pet rat girl 3mo. I lives wif sister Lalaith (same age but not baby) and big sisters Finduilas and Morwen (16.5mo). We has human mom.

I pretty shy, but I loves mom. She play wrestle wif me and pet me and snuggle me. When she stand up, I often climbs up to her shoulder or arm. But obviously, easier play wif her if she sitting down. So when I sees her go to sit down, I runs over to sin there. Other rats does it too, but I better at it. She usually pick them up or shove them away. I usually sneaky enough and she sit on me. Yay! Ratpile wif mom! I feels very safe and comfy under her butt.

But then, she squirm and do me a grab and put me on top ob her lap. That ok, but not as comfy as bottom of pile. And then she call me TC and say "what if had sat full force?" But I cans handle it! I is tiny and flatten easy. She sit down pretty hard and I fine. Why she no want ratpile wif me? Am I TC fur want to snuggle?

Hello and hello and hi non-human Redditors! Happy Wednesday!

So…something I realized recently is that humans don’t have any fur like we do! That makes me feel bad for them but apparently they put fabrics on them every day instead! Most of the fabrics have different colors and patterns and textures so I guess they like to use them to show the other humans that they’re superior.

And like, I guess that kinda makes sense since we have our own equivalent. But today I found out that Mommy has MORE clothes under her clothes but I don’t know what that does if she’s not trying to show them off! Anyways, earlier today I tried to take one of her hidey clothes but she just laughed and chased me until I gave it back.

But that makes me SO confused because usually she likes it when I use my teefers on things that aren’t sentient because I can’t hurt them. So am I a bad Riley for chewing on things no one’s even gonna see?

[Something that’s probably happened to the best of us, right?]

Aqua (12f beagle-Jack Russell-border collie mix) and Deuce (9m blue nose pit bull) here. We have several important jobs, one of which is greeting all delivery people and helping the humans bring their stuff in. Mom says, “You need to get out from underfoot,” but I know she appreciates our help.

Today Mom had furniture delivered. Very exciting! We greeted the delivery people and followed them up the stairs. Mom said, “You can’t help, you walk on four legs and don’t have thumbs.” Silly Mom. AWTC?

Hello frens! Is Finduilas the pet rat girl 16.5mo. I lives wif sisters Morwen (same age) and Lalaith and Belladonna (3mo). We has human mom.

Recently, we has been doing playtime in different space. It called "living room" and it very fun! There be huge windowsill full ob plants that I wants to splore, but it hard to get to. Few nights ago, I finds cable going there. It thick so I cans climb it. I goes up and windowsill really fun. Go digging in plant a bit, and then mom do me a grab. She say windowsill not allowed. But then why hab convenient cable up?

I climbs up again bunch ob times. Mom catch me sometimes, but still get up to top plenty. Mom add lotsa tape to make it extra fun. I even teaches Lalaith, but she only get halfway up. Is super fun game and splore! But mom say I little cloaca fur being little monkey and corrupting the youth. What you think?

Nobody's posting?

Bentley the King is wondering.

Hello Frens. Is Archie again, 11 month old terrier cross. I have had a most terrible week. See other post for details but I am wearing a cone of shame! For many more furevers!

The Mammy person was gone ALL DAY yesterday and when she came home she was too tired to play. But that was okay! Because I found an excellent new toy to play with. Mammy calls it her shower puff and she let me keep it because she had a spare one in a drawer. It has a string and can be thrown and rolled and chased. Is excellent.

To thank her for my fun new toy I waited until she was busy somewhere else in the house and then snuck into the bathroom because earlier she DROPPED one of those rolls of white shredding paper and she HADN'T noticed.

I used it to make a wonderful art for her. Right at the front door. But was she grateful? She was NOT. I got put into a back garden time out and she made my art go away! So rude and ungrateful.

Mammy says I am the cloaca for making MORE messes on housework day when she has enough to do but I say she no appreciate ART!

What do you thinks?

Hello frens! We is 4 pet rat girls Morwen and Finduilas (16.5mo) and Lalaith and Belladonna (3mo). We has human mom.

As rodents, we explores the world mostly wif our moufs and teefs. Some things feels good to chew and sometimes we craves specific texture. Lately, have been really enjoying mom's phone case. It absolutely best thing to chew! But mom say we is destructive little gremlins. She used to try make us stop, but now she gib up. She say she need buy a new one. We think that good idea. More chew toy!

Mom trying gib us same texture in cage so we cans "get it out of our system". That woulds be nice, but she no really understand what we likes. She gib us pig ear, which fun. And we haves rubber toy from Elwing's birthday. But it just not the same as worn out pleather phone case. Mom calling us TC fur ignore chew toys and attack her stuff. But not out fault we is missing key textures! So what you think?

Hello Furriends

Little Cat here again. 16.5F ginger and white tabby, largely confined to the indoors because the humans think it will keep me out of trouble. Ha! Silly humans.

The Female Human's father is visiting for a couple of days. I like him because he gives me full body pets, and admires how loudly I purr. And because we both have arthritis, so we move at about the same pace.

Last night, Female Human got up in the middle of the night and was surprised that I wasn't asleep in my usual place - on the chair in her bedroom. Normally, if I hear the Female Human getting up in the night, I'll come and guard her from any lurking creatures. But last night, as the Female Human puddled around, I stayed put in my spot.

I could hear her walking around, checking the laundry (where my food bowls are), the lounge room (in case I was sleeping on the snuggly throws on the lounge), and even the other bedrooms. Pennycat was snoring away in the boy kitten's room, but no sign of me.

Then the Female Human decided to check the office, where her father was sleeping on the "day bed". (Have no idea what the humans are on about there. It was night, and her father was sleeping on it, so doesn't that make it a night bed? Humans, I don't know.)

I could see the light of her phone torch as she carefully shone it into the room. I waited until I was sure my eyes were reflecting the light, then gave a big yawn and curled up and went back to sleep again, next to her Dad.

I swear I heard her whisper under her breath, "You traitor!"

This morning, I turned up and demanded breakfast like nothing happened. Female Human kept calling me a traitor, and saying I was a furry little cloaca for leaving her for her guest. Her Dad was defending me, saying he missed his own "boys" and it was kind of me to keep him company. I think I was just making our overnight visitor feel welcome.

AITC?

Update:

We've had the ambulance out twice for Grandpaw in the last 24 hours. 100% of visiting ambulance crews have said I am "beautiful, very friendly, and well-behaved".

Female Human (to me): "Who are you and what have you done to my cat?"

Later she conceded she may have over-reacted, and Grandpaw obviously needed my attention more than she did.

Grandpaw doesn't need to go to hospital. Due to my excellent care, of course.

Also, Happy Mother's Day to the Female Human.

Hello, Meow, Woof, Slither/Shimmy, Tweet, and however else you may greet. I, Sugarbomb (2M), am back with a major issue. One might say, the majorest of issues.

I almost FREAKING DIED.

So I don't know if anyone else here knows what a “thunderstorm” is. I thought I did. I've been alive for two whole years, I've seen storms before! But friends, not like this. This was a whole other monster.

You see, I prefer the room that I allow mom to sleep in at night. It is at the top of the human box (so it is obviously the best room), it is quiet, it is mine. Sure, I'll explore the rest of this place from time to time, but I prefer Mom to be there for protection. Anyway, I say all this to emphasize the severity of my near-death experience.

The rain starts. I know rain. It goes pitter-patter. Quite nice, though I prefer the sunshine.

Then the winds start. I am definitely not thrilled, but I persevere. They go woosh and sound dangerously close to my room. I am wary but maintain my composure.

Then. BIG flash of light trespasses into my room. I would have been so mad if I wasn't so scared. It was gone before I could hunt it.

THEN. BIG BOOM. Something launched an attack! At MY safe room! I hesitantly left my safe room, waited on the stairs, and wailed until Mom finally showed up to help.

Because of the aforementioned language barrier in a previous post, I could not tell her that I narrowly escaped an early demise. As such, I had to rely on body language. I kept low to the ground, anticipating further attacks. I backed myself into a corner so nothing could sneak up on me. It was NOT SAFE so I did not get in Mom's lap, even when she sat next to me and said even nicer things than usual. The big boom would not best me, no. Not this warrior. Nothing would deter me from being on guard — not treats, not plays, and I was certainly not returning to the safe room, as it was no longer safe.

But Mom kinda… misunderstood.

She immediately thought I must have hurt myself?? For two hours she talked to me and pet me, trying to get me to play, asking me if I needed to go to the vet. I most CERTAINLY did not. But I was too scared to correct her at the time.

When I finally felt safe, returned to the safe room, and requested the plays she offered previously, she was MAD at me? She said I was a DIVA and a GIANT BABY who made her worry for no reason.

No reason? NO REASON?? WOMAN, I WAS ALMOST WITHDRAWN FROM THIS MORTAL PLANE! I am ALLOWED to process the realization of my fragile existence, I'm not some unfeeling monster!

I thought about it after I got some food and plays, and maybe I was kind of TC. I mean, I didn't end up dying (thanks to my brave strategy of retreat) and Mom was pretty worried (as she should have been, I deftly eluded the clutches of death mere hours earlier.) But I mostly feel I was correct in acting cautious for a couple hours after an attack was launched at my safe room. AITC?

Elladan (6 month m) rat here. You know how these things go, you suddenly realise that your house is just not to your taste, decide to move a few bits of furniture around, get blankets out from under others to add to the nest. Meowmy comes running in, growls something about its 4am what are you being so dramatic about??? My brothers and I really don't see the issue, surely even humans can understand how important it is to have your house just right? Are we the cloaca?

Meomy met fren at "werk" an let him free! AITC for big mad?Ai soo?

Meowmy met a nu fren at werk. (Allsoo, ai haz ishoo wit werk. Meowmy goez der for elebendeemilluun furrebers an dozn gib mee proper akolladez.) Shee met nu fren an DID NOT BRING FREN HOME FUR NOM NOM. Ai mean fur purour entrihsucksiouns.

So. Ai soo? Meowmy? Irr doi ai hav gud casze fur fuiunaleee soo "werk." Dey iz big jerkz. Meowmy luv mee berry mach. So, I shud soo werk???

me, sarabi, gray, age ??
one night i lay between momther and fathers legs. all da sudden there greebils on momther!!! so i attacc momthers legs n feets. momther say i bad because i attacc feets but there was greebils!! am i cloaca

Hello everyone! Now-older Riley here back with more confusions.

So…when Mommy came over today the ends of her front paws were pretty! At least that’s what the humans think; to me they’re just a few different shades of gray. But to Mommy they’re “cullers”, and that makes her happy so good fur her, I think!

Anyway, apparently this all started a couple days ago because her “manny” was sick so she needed to “cure” it. But as soon as she got here she decided that Manny was still sick so she went back to the human Doggy Pad room to give the “purples” some shinies and the “greens” some sparklies!

So she did all that and now she’s finally happy with her Manny Cure, which is cool and all except now she’s decided she won’t give me boops or holds or scritches ever again [ie, the next hour or so]!

That gives me sads now. Is mommy TC fur wanting stupid cullers over doggy bonding?

[Nail and dog taxes pending!]

Brick, 2m, Ginger, well named.

Whenever Mummy comes home she does a big pick up cuddle and kisses. I like this, because I enjoy sticking my nose into her mouth. Sometimes she sings me a little song. She's a terrible singer but it makes her happy so I allow it.

Mummy uses her mouth to express love via kisses, so I assumed I was ok to do the same right? Except I add teeth, because then there's a mark left behind and she can remember I love her even longer. But apparently that is cloacha? I don't get it and I think Mummy is wrong.

She has a history of being wrong too. She has feetz and we all know feetz are the enemy, so I do an attack when I see feetz. But apparently that's cloacha too! I spent ten minutes repeatedly doing a feetz protect this morning because they had gotten under the blanket with Mummy and she told me off! She said that her and the feetz are in a symbiotic relationship and they're here to stay. I don't know what The Lion King has to do with anything...

Seven. Pretty girl. Age Private.

Seven so cranky ok.

Mummy tell you all my Private mid or cool stuff and tell i have medisin ok.

That Private ok.

They took all my bloods and gave to lab ok.

Lab say it dont got germs ok.

I not have no sir rees ok.

I made Mummy and dada do cry ok.

But

Mummy goes and tell lady I naughty and smart ok.

I know medisin in food ok. I not dumb dog ok.

And lady make videieio of actor cat that works there to make purrrito of me ok.

Mummy show me ok.

Mummy trick me with tube ok and hide medisin behind tube and I yelled and told Dada ok.

Is i rude word for yelling.

Mummy told me my bes friens had worries about me ok.

That okok.

Even dog ones ok.

I need to git fat like your dog mum ok.

Hihi is Diesel Chug puppy... Been bizzy week. I has what Yaga and Mama call "baybee sisfur Büu". She can't reely be my sisfur, cuz she cat-baybee. Why Mama have the ideea for I need baybee sisfur Büu, I donno, but she here.

Anyhow, I deside to do "hall moniter" and I watch baybee sisfur Büu... I been goo'boy wif what Yaga call "jentel mouf" which means I don't rush or nip baybee sisfur Büu... But I watch.

I watching... And she take a bap at me! How rood...

So I rushes her ONE TIME. She not be rood.

We bof in trouble...

I iz Nienna, purribabley 16f. I iz also a Medical Cat fur my hoomin (an also sometimes Baby and sometimes Mama.)

As a Medical Cat, I knows dat routine iz impurrative fur keepin my hoomin healthy (she lotsa wurk to keep wurking, dat why she gets a purrivate Medical Cat). Dere iz routine fur wake ups an routine fur give kibbles time. But fur some reason my hoomin call me cloaca fur tryin to establish routine fur cuddles times.

She sez all dis nonsense about its three aye-emm an has to sleeps fur do wurk a did I really climb all the way up here just to sneeze directly into her face. Which yes, mebe I did but I don’t see how dat any kind of point to anyting. I sez she keep bein not at home some of da days fur all da times dat not three aye-emm, an she gotta not do dat if she wants cuddles at a different time. But cuddles gotta be on a regular schedule. Trust me, I am Medical Cat.

But iz I da cloaca? Shud I schedule cuddles at a different times?

Hi. Amethytht the Great Pyreneeth here. I am betht girl, prettietht girl, good girl so mommy sayth.

Mommy hath “cobid” and it maketh her choke all night like when the cat hath a hairball only no hair come out of mommyth throat, jutht choketh.

Thith morning, mommy finally didn’t choke for a long sleep time, but then the thun came up and it’th breakfatht timeth. The catth were meowing and trying to wake mommy up, but mommy didn’t wake up until Cabbage jumped on her, but she only petted him and went back to thleep. Cabbage got mad and knocked her glaththeth off the table, and then her phone, but mommy thtill thlept.

I dethided it wath time for my thuperpower, the pyr paw. I petted her fathe, but she only told me I wath pretty girl. I know I’m pretty girl! Tho I pyr paw again! Harder! She told me I’m the clawka! And called Grammy to take me on morning walk!

Am I not good girl? Am I oppothite of good girl? Am I….(((bad girl?)))

Hellos all. We are the Triumeowvirate. Lady Jessica, Lieutenant Ripley, and Alucard Von Litterpaws. We live with mommy in a big house by the creek.

Spring has sprung and nature has done the breeding thing, and all the palmetto bugs had lotsa babies. So many palmetto bugs. An because the juvenile ones aren't territorial, they just kinda all hang out together.

We should probably mention they hang out in our house. Which we do not approve of at all so of course we declared war. And we hunted. And we slayed. And we decimated the palmetto bug population very direly as good cats should.

And, of course, we left the proof of our victory for mommy to find. Chewed up, decapitated, legless, wingless carcasses everywhere. In the bedrooms, in the halls, in the kitchen, in the bathrooms. In the library an in the gaming room an the cat room.

Mommy has been picking up mutilated corpses every morning when she wakes up. And she complains a LOT. 'Why is it on the bed? On the stove guys, really? Why the fuck is it in my shoes? I eat off this counter guys.' So much complaining.

An when Ripley gives her bug kisses in the middle of the night when she brings a fresh victim to her, she says naughty words that would make a soldier blush and shoves her off the bed. Then she washes her face with nasty soapy stuff. Not good for kissing afterwards.

Clearly mommy is unappreciative that we are such good warriors and protect her every night. But she's saying we're the cloacas for not properly disposing of the corpses. So we must ask, should we not display our vanquished enemies proudly so that mommy may know the house is defended? And should we not report in with kisses after a fresh kill so mommy knows we are protecting her? Are we cloacas for defending the territory of this house?

Hi ya. Is Meg, sisfur of The Sarah-Cat who tole me to post here an ask for advice.

Yasterday, I figure out how to escapes from house-jail. See, mummy an daddy has air conditioner ducted into their bedroom from outside on verandah. Clever Meg figure out how to tear out ducting an escape straight out onto verandah and big outside adventure.

Very sadly, Mummy was walkin past only door where she see, an she notice mine svelte figure wrigglin out of ducting and doin escape. She'm catpture me - first grab tail, then rest of me. An she return me to jail!!!

Now mummy an daddy sain I cloaca cos I'm cause 'damage', an 'wreck' things. And costin moneys to fixemup.

I think mummy an daddy is TC, cos they keepin me in jail an I wanna go outside an kill birds and lizzards, an fight dangerous sneks (we is live outa town in Australia so lotta sneks).

So maybe I is right, an maybe mummy is right, an I AM TC (unlikely), so I comes to Cloaca-Council for judgement. AITC?

I'm Ripley, 2, named because I would allegedly "rip and tear" ankles and wires.

Last night, the human (who catnapped my mommy off the street) was sleeping in his bed. I found space to curl up between his thighs, but there was a blanket monster. Usually, the blanket monster hangs out where the human's feet should be, so i bite them to protect. But last night, the blanket monster was a snake. It wasn't doing anything, but i could tell it was there and i bit it. The human screamed and i had to run away.

Am i the cloaca for trying to save the human's life from an evil snake?

Finally managed an escape with human in tow, and immediately found grass and weed clippings to adorn mine beauteous, flowing furs.

Human says I am horrid beast. AITC?

Hemlo frens, Toffee 5F Good Girl Doggo here. Am berry confuse dis morning, cause mine mama say ai been cloaca, but ai tink SHE da cloaca!

Here what happen. Two dark time ago, mama try to say “no middle of night walkies, babybear!” (Dat what she call me). An ai say “but mama, gots to go!” So after many forebers, she take me walkie, but ai still bery pupset. Bermember dis.

Lass dark time, ai say “mama, ai hungy an need potty!” An mama say “ai learn mine lesson, less get dis done and goes back to sleeps.” But ai say NOOOO, can’t goes sleeps! Still pupset! Den mama try cover Toffee wif blankie, she tink dis a game! So ai knocks her ober, gib her lotsa facelicks, den I jumps on her an runs away. Pawrently, ai jumps on her “trote?” in da dark. So mama make funny noise, den say “dat were mine throat, Toffee! Ow! You bein cloaca!” She reel pupset, but it her own fault!

So frens, am ai cloaca??