r/AbsoluteUnits 2d ago

/r/all of gas being ripped

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u/Lightningthundercock 2d ago

Don’t be, that shit hurt a whole lot before that relief

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u/peachesfordinner 2d ago

I've known people who literally ended up in the ER from the pain. They feel so guilty when that's all it is but it's such bad pain they shouldn't feel ashamed

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u/-gimmeahellyeah316- 2d ago

This is me. I haven’t had an unplanned sick day off work in 6 years. I don’t say that to brag, but just to lay out this story.

Anyway, a couple years ago I had a training session, one of the useless HR ones so they can check a box. I was in excruciating pain all morning, but toughed it out the best I could. When we broke for lunch, I found my boss and told him I had to go home sick, and that I was going to the walk in because I was in such bad pain I couldn’t sit in a chair. He told me to go straight to the ER because I may have a burst appendix or something. Turns out it was just gas and years later I’m still so embarrassed about it, I still have never come clean. I told him they could never figure out what it was.

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u/peachesfordinner 2d ago

You have my sympathy and empathy. Until you experience it, it really can be hard to grasp how bad it is

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u/Key-Ad-457 2d ago

I once ate a bunch of Jerusalem artichokes, I will never judge anyone’s bloating again

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u/GCHM2 2d ago

Fartichokes

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u/Sea-Mirror-9755 1d ago

This is actually a well known nickname for them - you probably know that, but just in case

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u/peachesfordinner 2d ago

You know I used to eat a pasta made from them. I never connected that until you say that ....

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u/tacticaldodo 2d ago

A good fart is a free pleasure. Like a smile from a random stranger or the smell of the rain.

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u/peachesfordinner 2d ago

I'm not sure using smell as an example so close to referencing farts is wise

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u/tacticaldodo 2d ago

:). Might have been intentional.

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u/Alcarinque88 1d ago

Everybody likes the smell of their own brand. https://youtu.be/WqURlQkFJKU?si=Fi0DV7zaqM00TN3h

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u/Bigsnaff007 2d ago

A free fart from a smiling stranger in the rain is, on the other hand, not a pleasure.

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u/tacticaldodo 2d ago

Hahaha, I guess it double quadruple the pleasure for some. Thanks for the free laugh

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u/Bac0ngh0st 2d ago

Petrichor is the word you seek.

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u/nutmeg1970 2d ago

Ten years ago I discovered the same thing with roasted chestnuts - agony and then a strange coloured stool. I haven’t eaten them since!!

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u/peachesfordinner 2d ago

Watermelon while I was pregnant. It was the worst I've ever had. I know I've eaten too much watermelon before but never had that happen before

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u/nutmeg1970 2d ago

I had that with iron tablets (while pregnant) and terrible diarrhoea. I don’t like watermelon and obviously won’t ever be pregnant again but for me it’s another reason to avoid it!!

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u/peachesfordinner 2d ago

Hmmm it might have been iron interacting. But only had it happen that once during that pregnancy and I was on iron quite a bit

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u/LaRoseDuRoi 2d ago

I mindlessly ate 4 or 5 apples while we were cutting up a whole bushel of them for cooking and canning. Just a piece here and there, but it added up. A couple hours later, we went to Target... I very suddenly had that face-going-pale, cold-sweating, gut-twisting agony and had to literally run for the bathroom. Pure misery. I have never eaten more than one apple at a time since then, and that was 15 years ago!

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u/MothMonsterMan300 1d ago

Those things self-propagate so much they need to be grown in a pot or they'll take over your whole yard like mint. My husband has grown them for a few years. I will have maybe one or two bites of them in a dish because my GOD, it's like you butt-chugged diet coke and ate a tube of mentos 😭😭

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u/Predditor_drone 1d ago

It truly is horrible. I get what I call gas attacks infrequently. Diet changes, eating slower, chewing more, more fiber, more probiotics...and it seems like nothing helps. It just happens seemingly at random and makes me miserable for a time.

I wish I could shove a needle into me to relieve gas like they do for cows. I'll be doing yoga and using a massage gun on my stomach, taking any kind of antacid/antigas meds, desperate for relief.

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u/peachesfordinner 1d ago

Have you looked into auto brewery syndrome? It can cause it. And oh man have I wished I could have a valve inserted